The Long Haul

For Husband and Wife (Day 17 — Maundy Thursday Bonus)
JUST SHARING (from the “Couple’s Devotional Bible”)
This article’s authors: Jim and Sally Conway
Bible Passage: Romans 2:1-16

Key Verse: Romans 2:7-8

“To those who by persistence in doing good seek glory, honor and immortality, he will give eternal life. But for those who are self-seeking and who reject the truth and follow evil, there will be wrath and anger.”

When a man and woman first marry, they usually start out quite happy. But according to statistics, they hit their lowest level of marital satisfaction by age thirty-five. And it tends to remain low until about age fifty, when it starts to rise again.

The couples who have long-term, happy marriages are the ones who make sure they have “togetherness time” on a regular basis. If careers and parenting responsibilities crowd their evening hours, they need to make time for each other in the mornings. Schedule a breakfast appointment at a restaurant, for example, where you can get caught up with each other’s lives.

If your marriage has become stale, there’s no better time than now to start doing romantic things – and establishing stronger emotional connectedness that will make your relationship more satisfying. It’s important that you do this, because over a period of years you’re going to go through several crises together. Things will happen with your children that will either be disappointments or tragedies. Your parents are aging, and it’s likely that at least one of them will die sooner than you expected them to. And there’s always the mid-life re-evaluation, which can be traumatic.

It’s important that you have your marriage relationship working well so you can make it through these tough times.

MARRIAGE BUILDERS

• How would you rate your marital satisfaction right now? Is it higher or lower than you expected at this time in your lives?

• When in the past week have you found spare moments for “togetherness time”?

Additional Scripture Readings: Job 23:10; James 1:12; Isaiah 48:10

Emotional Connections

For Husband and Wife ( Day 17 of 18 )
JUST SHARING (from the “Couple’s Devotional Bible”)
This article’s authors: Jim and Sally Conway
Bible Passage: Acts 2:25-28

Key Verse: Acts 2:28

“You have made known to me the paths of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence.”

When a man enters his mid-life years, he often feels that his wife is mothering him. But instead of a mother, he wants his wife to be a “girlfriend.” By mid-life a man usually begins to concentrate more on his marriage. But in the meantime his wife has become a mother to their children, and in a sense her husband has become just one of the children.

For a woman to become a girlfriend to her husband, she needs to develop more spontaneity. It might mean assuming a younger outlook on life, or a younger approach to the relationship. She should think in terms of how a younger woman would act around her husband. She should show admiration and affirmation, and act more flirtatious.

More than anything it’s an attitude. No matter how old you are, you can always regain a more light-hearted approach to marriage. Other things in life aren’t as urgent as they seem. They can wait. It’s time to give your spouse your time and attention.

MARRIAGE BUILDERS

• What were some of the most enjoyable aspects of your courtship?

• How could some of those “dating” behaviors fit back into your life together today?

Additional Scripture Readings: Proverbs 5:18; Ephesians 5:33