Naligaw sa building. Kanino kayang alaga (pa-‘sugo’) ito? 😆
Naihian na ba kayo sa ulo ng paniki?
Hanep sa opening kwestyun ano? ampanghe! 😆
Naalala ko kasi nung highschool pa lang ako… sa Calamba, takip-silim. Overhead, andaming nagliliparang mga “kabag” o yung maliliit na paniki (awoooooooooooo!!! 😯 ). Nakatuwaan kong pagbabatuhin. May isang bigla na lang na nag-shift ng direksyon pa-head-on sa kinaroroonan ko. Hindi naman nag-landing sa mukha ko, pero parang eroplanong stealth fighter na may inilagpak sa bumbunan ko.
Nung kapain ko, basa… 🙄 nung amuyin ko ang kamay ko, ay powtah… ambahooooooO!!! 😡
“Sutil ka kasi eh… hindi ka naman inaano! E di iyan ang napala mo!” 😆 (eka siguro nung bastos na flying daga).
Ahehe… paano pa kaya kung etsas yun? (Kahit pa ba epektib na pertilayser ang guano!) At, mga mister at misis, paano din kaya kung asawa mo ang “paniki”?
Sowee, mga kapatid… medyo kambyo ang tono ng post ko ngayon – hindi “wholesome” (Kids, close your eyes). 😆 Hindi seryus, at walang sermon. In other words, “makapagpatawa lang.” 😀 😆 😀 ← maliliit ang bunganga ng mga emotikongs na ito. Para maski sa blog man lang ay “maipagmalaki” kong minsan ay “nagluko” din ako. 😈
Here are five cases of a wife (and her husband) screwing around. Hindi ko na tinagalog, para obyus na imported from da istets. Huwag nyong “kokopya-hin”:
2 cases: Husband, unsuspecting 🙄
A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked about having a son. They decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted. The wife got pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy. The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son. He was horrified at the ugliest child he had ever seen. He told his wife:
“There’s no way I can be the father of this baby. Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered! Have you been fooling around behind my back?”
The wife smiled sweetly and replied: “Not this time!”
A mortician was working late one night. He examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, about to be cremated, and made a startling discovery. Schwartz had the largest private part he had ever seen!
“I’m sorry Mr. Schwartz,” the mortician commented, “I can’t allow you to be cremated with such an impressive private part. It must be saved for posterity.”
So, he removed it, stuffed it into his briefcase, and took it home.
“I have something to show you won’t believe,” he said to his wife, opening his briefcase.
“My God!” the wife exclaimed, “Schwartz is dead!”
2 cases: Husband–approved? 😕
A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.
“Hurry,” she said, “stand in the corner.” She rubbed baby oil all over him, and then dusted him with talcum powder.
“Don’t move until I tell you,” she said, “pretend you’re a statue.”
“What’s this?” the husband inquired as he entered the room.
“Oh it’s a statue,” she replied, “the Smiths bought one and I liked it so I got one for us, too.”
No more was said, not even when they went to bed.
Around 2 AM the husband got up, went to the kitchen and returned with a sandwich and a beer.
“Here,” he said to the statue, “have this. I stood like that for two days at the Smiths and nobody offered me a damned thing.”
A man walked into a cafe, went to the bar and ordered a beer.
“Certainly, Sir, that’ll be one cent.”
“One Cent?” the man exclaimed.
He glanced at the menu and asked: “How much for a nice juicy steak and a bottle of wine?”
“A nickel,” the barman replied.
“A nickel?” exclaimed the man. “Where’s the guy who owns this place?”
The bartender replied: “Upstairs, with my wife.”
The man asked: “What’s he doing upstairs with your wife?”
The bartender replied: “The same thing I’m doing to his business down here.”
1 case: “God”-ordained ??? 😆
A woman takes a lover home during the day while her husband is at work. Her 9-year old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them and hides in the bedroom closet to watch. The woman’s husband also comes home. She puts her lover in the closet, not realizing that the little boy is in there already.
The little boy says, “Dark in here.”
The man says, “Yes, it is.”
Boy: “I have a baseball.”
Man: “That’s nice.”
Boy: “Want to buy it?”
Man: “No, thanks.”
Boy: “My dad’s outside.”
Man: “OK, how much?”
In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the lover are in the closet together.
Boy: “Dark in here”
Man: “Yes, it is.”
Boy: “I have a Wilson infielder’s glove.”
The lover, remembering the last time, asks the boy, “How much?”
Man: “Highway robbery. Sold.”
A few days later, the father says to the boy, “Grab your glove, let’s go outside and have a game of catch.”
The boy says, “I can’t, I sold my ball and my glove.”
The father asks, “How much did you sell them for?”
The boy says, “$500”
The father says, “That’s terrible to overcharge your friends like that… that is way more than those two things cost. I’m going to take you to church and make you confess your greed.”
They go to the church and the father makes the little boy sit in the confession booth and he closes the door.
The boy says, “Dark in here.”
The priest says, “Don’t start that shit again, you’re in my closet now.”
“Very funny! 😕 ” eka ng mga ‘kano… kahit nga naman may santokristo ka pa sa dibdib.
Padadaig ba naman ang Pinoy? Eto pa (last na ito 😳 )… pero huwag kayo magalit sa kababayan nating si Inday hane? Unfortunately, isa lang naman sya sa mangilan-ngilang (?) kababaihan natin ngayon na kung ide-describe ay “mas malaki ang dibdib kaysa sa utak.” 😛
(innocent) Batgirl (#6)
Mam: “Inday, buti naman at bumaba na ang ‘bills’ natin sa tubig at kuryente!” 🙂
Inday: “Oo ate. Kasi po sumasabay nang maligo si sir sa akin, at pinapatay na rin nya ang ilaw pag tumatabi sya sa akin!” 😀
Sambadi plis weyk her ap… wawa naman – napagpipistahan lang ng mga mister na “matitipid” 😆 at obsessed sa cleavage na paris ni Sir.
Hahahaha 😛 hehehehe 😆 hihihihi 😐 hohohoho 😦 huhuhuhu 😥
Tama na oy, baka kabag ang abutin mo. 😆